And Waiting Some More

 More waiting.  And worrying.

I came Christmas day, met up with my brother, and came to see my Mom.  She was grumpy in that way and okish.

The next morning, my brother left early, and I came to the hospital with my Mom.  And sat.  She was pretty good during the day.  Not super chatty or anything, but ok.  That was Sunday.  Monday was a little improved.  Tuesday was a little improved.  The Physical Therapy person walked her to and from her door twice.  Good!

Then Wednesday, she just seemed super lethargic.  I asked the nurse about it and was basically told nothing to worry about, no problem, just tired.

Thursday, she was even more lethargic.  I asked the nurse about it, and was told the same.  I asked the doctor about it, and the same.  (But I missed seeing the doctors on rounds, maybe I was in the restroom.  They come in, say a few words, and leave really fast in a little pack.  It would be nice if they'd introduce themselves.)

Today, Friday, she's super lethargic again.

So, this doesn't strike me as fading into the sunset sort of lethargic.  This strikes me as drugged lethargic.  If I felt like she were fading into death, I'd be sad, but okay.  She's 90 and has had a good life.  But this doesn't feel like that.

I keep asking.

Yesterday, the Physical Therapist tried to get her up.  She would sit up, then stood, but all she wanted to do was sleep.  I don't think this is my Mom being depressed or uncooperative or whatever.  I think this is her being druggy lethargic.

Today, I caught the doctors on rounds.  I explained what I'd seen over the past few days, the increasing lethargy, change from walking on Tuesday to barely sitting or standing yesterday.

They all said the nice stuff I'm sure they're told to say: thank you for advocating.  We hear your concern.  

They said they'd run some test on her blood for the new drug they're giving her, but that it doesn't cause lethargy.

So here's the thing:  they should be concerned that she's grown more and not less lethargic on their watch, no?  I don't know if they're over busy, over worked, exhausted, bored by her case, given up on her because she's 90, or what.  But they don't seem like they do more than say the words they've been told to say in that meaningless way.

OMG, it's like listening to the administrative types blather meaninglessly in ways that really mean, "we aren't interested in this and aren't doing a thing about it because something else... but we want you to feel placated."

I don't feel placated.

Waiting

 My Mom fell a week or so before Christmas, and then had an episode of ... sort of not being there or something, so they took her back to the hospital (after sending her home the day after her fall having observed her all night).  And now we're waiting on a room in a rehab place.

I remember reading before how transferring patients to rehab or nursing facilities was hard and horrible, and now I'm living at least some of the frustrations of that.

I got here Christmas, and my brother was here.  He's amazing in all the best ways.  He brought me up to her room.  And then he flew out the next morning, and I've been here every day since.  So, this is day five on my watch, still waiting on a place.  And it doesn't look like anything is happening very fast.  

My hope is for Monday.  Finger's crossed.  I'm flying out on Tuesday morning... just changed my plans to that, but may have to change them again. 

***

I read something the other day that all sorts of medical folks are getting involved in various arts, writing, and such to deal with the pandemic stress, and it reminded me of some of the medical blogs I read back in the day when blogs were more of a thing.  I guess they were just ten years early (or more?)

***

One thing getting a PhD or working in any academic setting prepares you for: patiently waiting for bureaucracy to edge towards getting something done.

One of the nurses told me she has four patients (including my Mom), and three of them are waiting on a room somewhere else to be discharged.  That has to be frustrating for everyone involved, no?

Do we not have enough skilled nursing/rehab facilities?  (That's my guess, along with the ones we have being understaffed for the holidays and extra understaffed with covid, and super extra understaffed with the omicron problem.

***

I started reading Station Eleven the day after Christmas waiting in the room.  (My Mom mostly sleeps.)  It's not a good choice for me, not right now, not during omicron, just not.  But it's really well written.

Remember When?

 We just had a bit of a snow dump, so here's a picture to remind us that warmer times with flowers and butterflies will come.