tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post5001324646441350874..comments2024-03-15T01:11:32.832-07:00Comments on Bardiac: Trying to BalanceBardiachttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11846065504793800266noreply@blogger.comBlogger5125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-76980167149073000112008-09-11T09:55:00.000-07:002008-09-11T09:55:00.000-07:00I grew up in the Upper Midwest, but not at all in ...I grew up in the Upper Midwest, but not at all in Lake Woebegon, and I can't stand Keillor. The only time I laughed at Prairie Home Companion was during an episode of The Simpsons. The family found itself watching the TV version of Keillor's show--Homer jumped up, slapped the television, and yelled "BE FUNNY!" at the show.<BR/><BR/>Didn't seem to work.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-84375329397064580152008-09-11T08:54:00.000-07:002008-09-11T08:54:00.000-07:00msilf -- that's awful, being yelled at. that is n...msilf -- that's awful, being yelled at. that is not acceptable behavior -- not from a boss, not from a student. <BR/><BR/>but in other instances, where you see a face fall despite speaking gently and with encouragement -- perhaps that is a good sign, and not a failure. that is a student who probably will be self-examining. and isn't that a goal of undergraduate education? the content of particular courses may not stick after 20 years, but larger lessons will.kathy a.https://www.blogger.com/profile/14479337952651746193noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-68391406540005164392008-09-11T08:39:00.000-07:002008-09-11T08:39:00.000-07:00i'm a mom, not an academic. it made me laugh, rea...i'm a mom, not an academic. it made me laugh, reading that you don't feel so maternal, because by the end of high school, my main motherly function was to nag [about getting some sleep, getting up in the morning, being on time, doing the homework, doing the homework, doing the homework].<BR/><BR/>it's not that beginning college students have not heard of deadlines. instead, they are struggling [some of them] with suddenly being in charge of themselves, frequently away from home for the first time, and having far more freedom than in high school. missing a class, for example, no longer results in school detention or parental grounding. but for some students [like my daughter], the transition to taking responsibility for oneself is not always entirely smooth. <BR/><BR/>to my horror, my talented daughter failed her freshman writing class last year, because she overslept too much and failed to get all the work in. but that was an important life lesson for her -- that she has to meet the expectations of the class. she was treated perfectly fairly; this was her own mess-up. that's what she really hates, admitting she messed up all by herself.<BR/><BR/>daughter ran into a few bumps in other classes. i encouraged her to talk to the professors, and when she did, that worked very well for her. she was afraid to hear condemnation, but what she actually heard was [a] exactly what the expectations were, and [b] encouragement.kathy a.https://www.blogger.com/profile/14479337952651746193noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-12519097237796811342008-09-11T07:56:00.000-07:002008-09-11T07:56:00.000-07:00Funny you write this today. I just had a similar t...Funny you write this today. I just had a similar thing on the other end. Even tiny criticism makes me just freak out...and today I got screamed at for something I was actually right about. After that, it didn't matter how right I was, how ridiculous the complaint was, all I can think about is having to face this guy after the weekend. It's tough. I always try to be gentle when I have to tell someone something to do differently (like students), but it's so hard...especially when people are trying so hard and unsure about expectations and what the penalty/consequence will be for a fuckup. I know, though, that I have told them stuff sometimes as gently, privately, and noncritically as I can, and still seen their faces fall.Sarahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/15606922510495018342noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-73572299839935055302008-09-10T22:03:00.000-07:002008-09-10T22:03:00.000-07:00I grew up in a Garrison Keillor environment, compl...I grew up in a Garrison Keillor environment, complete with a Scandinavian Lutheran church, lutefisk dinners, Norwegian farmers, and Swedish Christmas carols. And yet that mild-tempered, polite, pleasing modesty (coupled with stubbornness, of course) drives me crazy at times. Maybe I don't think Keillor is funny...because I grew up in a Lake Woebegone place. (When I hear him tell a story, I want to shout, "Get ON with it, will you?") <BR/><BR/>So the West Coast bluntness is something I like, but something that can be hard on my students. (And frankly, I can dish out that bluntness better than I can take it myself, which means I'm more Prairie Home than I'd like to believe.) <BR/><BR/>Coming from such a culture, I think that the secret to speaking in this culture (from somewhere in Luther's Small Catechism, I'm sure) is to be blunt...but to say blunt things in a quieter voice, and with a slight smile. A phrase my father, a 5th grade teacher, often used on his students was: "I'm not upset with you. You can tell that I'm calm and I'm not raising my voice. I simply need to remind you to turn in your assignments on time, because it's a class rule, and because you'll be more successful that way." <BR/><BR/>Calm. Rational. Ja, sure, you betcha.Terminal Degreehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/16523014953046778630noreply@blogger.com