tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post3737918469268457804..comments2024-03-15T01:11:32.832-07:00Comments on Bardiac: Off CampusBardiachttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11846065504793800266noreply@blogger.comBlogger6125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-24072437894274116992010-11-21T16:31:38.969-08:002010-11-21T16:31:38.969-08:00p.s. -- congrats on teh 7 lbs.! but i really admi...p.s. -- congrats on teh 7 lbs.! but i really admire that you're so good about the "playing outside," riding your bike, and all those other active things that distinguish you from a computer potato.kathy a.https://www.blogger.com/profile/14479337952651746193noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-17655238841602271512010-11-21T16:12:50.237-08:002010-11-21T16:12:50.237-08:00i think your comment to the neighbor about people ...i think your comment to the neighbor about people being "polite" was an appropriate response. knowing of her surgery and goal, comments like "you look great" or "how's it going?" are safe but allow her to elaborate if she wishes. <br /><br />for me, only relatives tell me i'm a bag of lard -- sometimes disguised sometimes as "helpful advice" about diet, exercise, etc. [the liposuction tip was in its own special category.] my response as a teenager was to buy as many donuts as i could, because i was by darn going on a diet the next day. fortunately, i'm more mature now. kinda.<br /><br />but i find comments about weight loss kind of strange, too. when i did actually lose weight, some comments were so enthusiastic that i wondered what they said behind my back before. more recently, i have been at a steady weight for years; so the occasional "oh, you lost weight!" comment is mystifying. my best guess is that i look better in certain clothes, but i'm bad at figuring out how to shop for clothes that i like which also look good to others.kathy a.https://www.blogger.com/profile/14479337952651746193noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-14134338543566460972010-11-21T14:06:41.205-08:002010-11-21T14:06:41.205-08:00We're in the same basic part of the country --...We're in the same basic part of the country -- so, I can understand her predicament... I lost a lot of weight over the summer, so when people saw me in the fall, they said things like "you look good today" etc... <br /><br />People who saw me more often (like the coffee shop lady ) ) -- only tended to notice once I hit the 50lb range... and then were reluctant to say anything. <br /><br />Also, if you're really heavy and lose a decent amount of weight, you'll still seem heavy to folks, so they'll tend not to notice... fat invisibility is a good thing when you're not happy with yourself, but not so good when you want folks to notice a change.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-85807434293147170342010-11-21T10:21:16.267-08:002010-11-21T10:21:16.267-08:00The advice columns used to have weight loss as an ...The advice columns used to have weight loss as an example of what NOT to mention, given that people have had exchanges like the following: "You've lost weight!" "Yes, I have cancer." Maybe they're trying to be polite, as is customary in your part of the country.undinehttps://www.blogger.com/profile/05589384016564587214noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-69484726762197269222010-11-21T09:58:43.757-08:002010-11-21T09:58:43.757-08:00I have a colleague/friend who lost over 30 pounds ...I have a colleague/friend who lost over 30 pounds a year ago in the summer and was then really upset that no one noticed when we returned to school ... but she also wears these big, baggy clothes that intentionally hide her body. And then she gained the weight back over the course of the year and felt that lack of support from friends was part of the issue. She lost that weight again last summer (she's much more active and apparently eats better in the summer than during school) and this time told me about the weight loss when school started so that she'd have some sense of accountability. I did point out that her clothing masked the weight loss, which she sort of got but sort of didn't. And here's the thing: It's been three months now, and I have no idea if she's kept off the weight or lost even more or gained it back. It's just too hard to tell. I'd like to be supportive, but it's hard to know just how to be.What Now?https://www.blogger.com/profile/04017629066466055668noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-17974015.post-40455676137198333762010-11-21T07:52:21.404-08:002010-11-21T07:52:21.404-08:00Yeah, that whole weight thing would be really awkw...Yeah, that whole weight thing would be really awkward. Someone who is extremely overweight could lose 50 or more pounds and it wouldn't be noticeable, unless you were holding a picture and comparing side-by-side. And if she's wearing loose clothes, no one will notice anyway. <br /><br />Good luck with your own health goals. Losing weight is so hard.Fie upon this quiet life!https://www.blogger.com/profile/12047096700049201873noreply@blogger.com